When you find out your boyfriend is cheating on you, it feels like your entire universe crumbles. I was in denial at first and tend to ignore it but truth always comes out and hearing it from the other people hurts. I guess it doesn’t matter anymore since it’s over but I still wonder what I’ve done to drive him to the arms of another girl. But I come to my senses that cheaters cheat. Cheating is not about boredom or dissatisfaction but it’s just a bad habit. It’s not worth the torture or embarrassing myself and making the same mistakes that millions of girls makes. It’s better to save my self-respect, dignity, cut my losses and move on to free myself for a better relationship with a more functional man. I’m not going to lie but I tend to blame it to other girls he flirts with or have a thing with and feeling angry that she’s got to be pure evil to steal my man. But that’s not the point because she’s not the one who’s committed to me and who promised to be loyal to me and besides if it’s not her it’s probably someone else. People cheat because they are cheaters. It’s not because he was innocently seduced by another girl’s wicked charms or offered something I didn’t have or because she’s better than me. Cheaters cheat. Cheating is a pattern of behavior that won’t stop no matter how many promises he makes or how many changes you make to keep his attention. If he has cheated on you, it’s time to move on. Cheaters cheat… and cheat… and cheat. They can’t help it. Everyone wants closure, who doesn’t? I never got mine but it’s pretty straight forward how it is. People would tell me it’s not me, the problem is him and I slowly starting to believe that I didn’t drive him to cheat. If he is cheating, it’s not a reflection of my worth, but an indication that he is incapable of handling the responsibility of maintaining a relationship. He is lacking mature adult coping skills. The problem is his, NOT MINE. I can’t do anything or even change myself to make a cheater loyal. Thinking about if I was prettier, wilder in bed, or more exciting and outgoing he would be faithful. But NO, he’s just the way it is. I’m angry about everything especially myself but I shouldn’t but because I’m hurt. He’s not even worth my time and tears for I have been cheated on and treated badly. Time heals and this experience would be just a lesson and only will make me stronger. Like they say if one chapter closes, another one begins; not looking back with regrets but to look forward on good things.
I hate pretending everything is alright when the truth is, everything is not.
Break ups aren’t easy but sometimes you just have to when you know it’s not worth anymore.
I’ll reply to every message you send me, hug you every time I get the chance, probably take a different route at school just to bump into you. Give you the longest hug out of everyone else when we’re in a group saying bye to each other. Just be with talking to you any time I can get the chance. And i’m probably looking like a huge idiot most of the time.